What Motivational Speakers Can't Say...

It can be a challenge to keep it real - on stage.

Now that I'm a motivational speaker, the "ALL SCHOOL ASSEMBLY" is an obstacle I LOVE to tackle. If I mess it up...I mess it up for all the speakers who come after me.

Today I had a unique opportunity. One that comes less often than I'd like. I got to speak at a Christian school. This made my talk SO much more real! I could finally share the reason I do what I do, and why you should, too.

I have nothing against people that don't share my beliefs. In fact, I respect those that are convicted and dedicated to something. BUT this is a HUGE part of my life that can get overlooked when speaking in a public setting... along with the pledge of allegiance, and many other things no longer acceptable or practiced.

To say the least, I was excited about today.

I had an AWESOME time hanging out with the students from Valley Lutheran High School in Phoenix, Arizona.



We laughed, cried, hugged, drank tea, and ate cookies... all in all that makes for a heck of a Friday morning. ::wink::

Today's message to the students of Valley Lutheran was very simple to say, but very hard to live out.

"God has a unique and personal vision for each and every one of us, but sometimes it's hard to follow that vision when everyone else is trying to create it for you."

Ultimately, I wanted the students to walk away asking themselves what that vision looks like for their lives. What tools, gifts, and dreams do they possess that will help them follow their vision?

If we don't paint a clear vision of where we're going, we can too easily be pulled into a life we never wanted.

This generation of teenagers are looked at with little to no expectations... TV, music... low expectations.

Then I told them about this "Dude"...

This guy that had long hair, hung out with thieves, His name was Jesus.

Jesus traveled and spoke to anyone and everyone... BUT did everyone convert? Did everyone accept what he was saying?

NO!

In fact, they killed Him because of it...

BUT...

He did change the lives of 12, and those 12 went out to changed the world.

We are POWERFUL, more powerful than we think. We just need to be reminded once and awhile.

The pics from the day were taken by my hottie wife, Gina Meola:



Before every talk I take time to kick it with God.



BIG shout out to my homie/roadie Dennis Gable (AKA, famous motivational speaker). There's nothing better than having a talented artist introduce you. Humbling.



Keep It Real.

Murph

Always remember you're unique... just like everyone else

Every Monday morning I come to a really "Hip" coffee shop called Cartel Coffee Lab to write my blog. I think it's a mix of the random music, crazy art, tattoos, piercings, skinny jeans, Toms Shoes, etc. It's like the hipster olympics!




I like their coffee, but the experience of being there is my motivation.

So every once and a while, I just sit back and chill. No writing, no thinking, just taking in the view.

Does anybody else "people watch"? I could sit at the mall all day just creepin my little heart out.

The past week has been busy, but inspiration-less on the blog front. Today, however, is very different! I need to get something off my chest!

In high school you fight desperately to fit in, then young adulthood sprouts and you're fighting desperately to stand out. Why do we try to be SO different, but eventually look the same? Do we think we're standing out by being the same?

I did some people watching, and came to the conclusion we all like to be different, or exclusive. This ends up getting copied, and then it's no longer unique... IT"S POPULAR!

I'm encouraging you to be different ALL THE TIME! Never give pop culture the opportunity to make your "different", norm.

Let me give you an example.

When I was younger I used to where this thing called a "slap bracelet". I know that I just made myself look MAD OLD, but I will make that sacrifice for the greater good of my point.

Slap bracelets were cool! I mean really cool. One kid gets CUT and has to ruin it for everbody...geez! Just kiddin. Sort of.




I was the first in my class to get one and people used to make me demo my little piece of SLAPPIN MAGIC! However, it wasn't long after that I started to see another kid with a slap bracelet, and another, and so on. Finally I had to stop wearin mine.

My point is this...

Don't get in the habit of following the trend, CREATE IT and move on!

Here's to being original and stuff.

Keep it Real,
Murph

Keepin' It Real: Students To Watch

Once a month I'd like to showcase a student that's "KEEPIN' IT REAL".

Too often you meet people in life that are forgotten...

We meet on the train, the bus, in class, we share brief conversations about the weather and politics and we move on. Life is full of cliche encounters.

When I first met Keith Smith I knew that my life would never be the same!

Keith has a certain presence that demands your FULL ATTENTION. He's African American, stands at 6 feet 3 inches, and isn't an ATHLETE! This kid is responsible for redefining "thinking outside the box". You can't put him in a box - HE DOESN"T FIT!

Keith attends Syracuse University, where he is a student in the VERY prestigious Bandier Program (music industry).



Keith is surrounded by an industry of "who ya know" and "undeserved privilege", but has managed to keep his identity deeply rooted in his Kansas City roots and his tenacious attitude to MAKE IT OR DIE! Keith came from simple beginnings, and attributes his success to never settling for normality.


The reason I chose to spotlight Keith is largely to due to his AMAZING ATTITUDE and appetite for LIFE!

Among other things, Keith is the front man for The Fly. In a recent article in Jerk Magazine Keith was described, “It was like his body was filled with fists that punched out in different directions, all at the same time,”

Occasionally we need to see students that live their lives to benefit the world. We need to see that with enough hard work, talent, and the right attitude we can do anything!

This is PASSION! This IS Keith Smith.





Keep It Real.

Murph

Driving a Land Rover? Oh, you still have a Landlord?

It's not your fault the WORLD told you it was okay!

Here's my beef with teen finances. No one makes you take responsibility for your money! I had to learn this the hard way.

I was the guy who would buy the $300 pair of jeans, but couldn't afford rent. The guy who paid more in overdraft fees than bills. The guy who JUST HAD to have the new J's before any of his homies. I, was that guy.

There are far worse examples, but you get the picture. Most of the trouble with finances is that we buy what we can't afford. We charge what we can't pay back, and nobody tells us we're wrong to do it!

Shame on you BIG credit card companies and car salesman. I mean it must be ALL their fault... right?

WRONG!

WE MAKE THE DECISIONS IN OUR LIFE, even if you think you have no control. We LOVE to blame our issues on other people. Sure, we've been brainwashed to want things we don't need, but what's scarier is being brainwashed that we have no control in the financial decision-making process.

Do you think American culture promotes entitlement? Like, we deserve all this stuff? That we HAVE to HAVE the best of the best? The biggest, brightest, and most expensive?

It's easy to get caught up in living for the TEMPORARY satisfactions of life. But all things eventually fade, go out of style, or become irrelevant. But the part that really bothers me the most is that it starts when you're a TEEN! In marketing, YOU are the next generation of CRAP buyers and consumers. So it ultimately has to come down to you, and the realization that LIFE'S more than things!

Let me give you the best advice I never had.

1) If you aren't saving any money, SOMETHING'S WRONG! Get in the habit of taking a little part of all the money you get and put it aside.

2) Don't get a CREDIT CARD! You don't need it. SERIOUSLY!

3) The jeans you want will be out of style in about 5 days. Plus, it's trendy now to find deals and steals at thrift shops or on sale wracks. Work that!

4) Read Rich Dad Poor Dad. Learn how money works and how it can work for you.

I'm not saying buying clothes when you need them is evil. What I'm trying to encourage is being responsible with our money. We need to start taking ownership of our decisions and understand that we have the POWER to control our financial destiny. It all starts now!

Keep It Real.

Murph

I Live In A Van Down by The River!!

Why motivational speakers "SUCK"!

Sometimes the hardest thing I have to do is explain what I do. I get interesting responses like, "Oh. You're like Tony Robbins or something". Well, sort of, but for, "like", young people.

Raise your hand if you have ever sat through a motivational speakers spiel - "A lengthy or extravagant speech or argument usually intended to persuade"? Now keep your hand raised if during that spiel you wanted to end your life because it was AWFUL!

If you're like me, my arms are flailing.

Motivational speakers are usually predictable and cheesy. They say they want you to change your life, BUT their own life is often in shambles! Or maybe they have nine steps, 12 steps, 43 steps... to a successful life. Even worse, they might have a book, a life changing journey through a painfully obvious solution. Everybody's got a book now! Seriously.


So after all this, why do I consider myself a motivational speaker? And if this were true, why do we need motivational speakers?

Here's my thought process. First, I'm stepping in to redefine "motivational speaker". Call it arrogance or pride, but this industry needs people who hold themselves accountable, stay relevant, and live out their words of encouragement. Second, we all need regular doses of motivation.

It’s like eating... just because you ate breakfast, doesn't mean your hunger is satisfied FOREVER! You regularly nourish your body. We can’t run on full steam ALL the time; so it’s never going to hurt to have the right person come in and help fuel your fire.

Let me help you identify a "good" motivational speaker.

1) Find somebody who you know “gets” your group. The initial connection between speaker and audience is crucial, so make sure your speaker knows who they’re talking to from the very start.

2) Make sure the program is customized to your needs and that the speaker has a hook that can draw people in.

3) I prefer funny, or at least engaging. Sometimes speakers have a heavy message, but it's all about the delivery.

4) Results! Can you measure the impact? Does the message come with a movement? Something your group can use to effectively increase the results you are looking for? What results are you looking for? What are you expectations for the speakers impact on your group? Make sure they can deliver.

5) And, most importantly, make sure your speaker is a real person, someone who practices what they preach.

To escape the "Matt Foley" stigma, let me give you some hope. There are motivational speakers out there doing it right. In the realm of youth, there are only a handful of professionals I've found who are KEEPIN IT REAL.

Here are some trusted speakers I personally endorse and keep up with:

Josh Shipp (the leader)

Dennis Gable (the healer)

Bianca Juarez (the believer)


“People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing - that's why we recommend it daily.” - Zig Ziglar

Keep It Real.

Murph

Mayday! Mayday! I'm Goin Down!

Sometimes I sit down at the computer and look for the "help" button! Wouldn't it be great if life were that easy?

Why is it SO stinkin' hard to ASK for help?

Myth: Asking for help makes us look weak.

Truth: Asking for help creates an atmosphere of empowerment. It communicates to others that, while you may not have all the answers, you are willing to find them.

Myth: Successful people never ask for help.

Truth: Actually, successful people will tell you that the key to success is knowing your strengths and weaknesses. Successful people are driven and motivated — and when the going gets tough, the tough ask for help!

The BIGGEST reason we don't ask for help is FEAR! Fear that we are going to look stupid or be judged for asking.


Relationships, depression, addictions, finances, parents, school, etc...
For the most part, all the advice or information someone provides you with, was LEARNED from someone or something else! Meaning: THEY don't know it all or have everything together, but they may have gone through an experience or asked the same questions.

I've come a long way in my life, but mostly because people have HELPED me get here.

I'm only as good as the people around me, and the sooner you realize this, the better your life will be.


The Secret

The secret to asking for help is asking EARLY!

I have found that the longer we wait to ask for help the worse things get. If we recognize early that we are in over our head, can't handle a situation, or don't get it, we may flat out miss the boat. We've got to identify our need for help early and tackle it before it overtakes US.

If you take nothing else away from this post, please realize the sooner you begin reaching out, the sooner the issues in your life will become manageable - and even non-existent.

Please continue to ask your questions at ASK MURPH ANYTHING And YES, you can do this anonymously!

Ask For Help. Keep It Real.

Murph

Web Si-eeeete!

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